I’ve been relegated to glasses for a week because of the… sorry. I’m pausing for a minute, because as I’m writing this, I’m channel surfing. And as I channel surf I see Topanga (you Boy Meets World fans should know who that is) presenting a two week stale “Dish” to me on style network, discussing Ru Paul, Paula Deen, and Shear Genius, and sinfully wearing an unflattering dress/belt/cami combination. I was just shocked out of a sentence.
The moral of this opening paragraph is: don’t watch Style Network late at night.
Unbelievable.
I was saying… the reason I’m relegated to glasses this week is because I used a scented soap before putting in my contacts a few days ago, and now… I’m sorry. All you need to know is that I have something that resembles an eye infection. Antibiotic drops. Glasses. One week.
So today I was trying to figure out how to kill some time and I wandered into Claire’s. Perhaps you’re familiar with Claire’s… it’s the Hannah Montana generation’s Harry Winston. Treasures abound in the form of Jonas Brothers backpacks, Hello Kitty hairclips, “retro” jewelry, and kid-friendly skulls and crossbones. As I said, I was killing time, and the only other shops within my line of sight were an Everything You Could Ever Need and All the Stuff You Don’t for Your Kitchen, and a Tempting, Unhealthy Food Court. I chose Claire’s.
As I perused through Hannah Montana hairbands and sparkly pink nail polish, I saw a sign that said “Attitude Glasses”. Underneath it hung thick, black framed glasses with clear plastic in place of lenses. Exactly like the ones I have been ordered to wear for a week.
Odd how things come full circle. Now to get the “attitude” I get from wearing my glasses, Hannah Montana worshipers need only to purchase them for fourteen fifty at the local accessories shop. They don’t even need a prescription. Now only if they came in Transitions…
